Chapter 68 – Married Life (Part 5)

Xu Yunchun finishes one exam, then skips and hops his way back home.

Wei Xiu: “How was your exam?”

Xu Yunchun: “Why would you ask such a question? Don’t you know who I am? I’m the first imperial guard personally brought up and trained by the great General Wei!” 

Xu Yunchun has his two hands on his hips as he proudly lifts his head. He is particularly skilled when it comes to working at the last minute. When he was young, Wei Xiu would have him memorize material, he would always push things back to the last day, struggle through it for a night, then have the whole thing memorized to a T.

Wei Xiu: “Since you finished your exam today, go study for tomorrow’s exam.”

Xu Yunchun turns around, sits himself on Wei Xiu’s lap, and leans into him: “First, I must snuggle.” 

Wei Xiu: “Go review.”

Xu Yunchun: “Young master!”

Wei Xiu lets out a heavy sigh, and stretches out his hand to block him.

Forget it, they’ll talk about it after the next exam.

–

After the following exam, Xu Yunchun is ecstatic.

Shen Xi intends to invite him out, but the other doesn’t want to waste another second so he zooms straight to his home. Thus, as soon as Wei Xiu opens the door, a mini “cannonball” is shot into his chest.

Wei Xiu catches him, and Xu Yunchun immediately wraps his arms around his neck for a kiss.

With a clink sound, Xu Yunchun’s teeth hit the muzzle.

“Why are you wearing the muzzle?” Xu Yunchun covers his teeth, then hurriedly reaches to feel downwards, “You’re even wearing the chastity belt?”

Wei Xiu:”Yes.”

Xu Yunchun: “Is there someone trying to harass you, a married man?”

Wei Xiu: “No.”

Xu Yunchun: “Then you…”

Suddenly, Xu Yunchun has a realization. He listlessly slides off of Wei Xiu’s lap. Then he sits onto the ground and starts bawling: “The young master’s abandoning Chunchun!”

Wei Xiu: “How could I be abandoning you!”

Xu Yunchun: “Then why are you afraid of touching me!”

Wei Xiu: “I just don’t want you to be spoiled rotten!”

–

Wei Xiu reasons: “Look at you! Spending all day suspended on my body, not studying, only focused on dating. There are seven days in a week and you spend half of that time in bed. Does that sound reasonable to you?”

Xu Yunchun: “I am just adopting the local customs! This is the culture of the Haitang world.”

Wei Xiu: “Do you know how much time I spend every day knotting?”

Xu Yunchun: “Of course I do! I timed it. On average, every day…”

Wei Xiu pinches Xu Yunchun’s mouth to prevent the utterance of indecent words.

Xu Yunchun waves his hand away, righteously: “We were fortunate enough to reincarnate, and no longer have to fight for our lives. Is it illegal for me to want to date?”

Wei Xiu: “We were fortunate enough to reincarnate, don’t you want to do something you weren’t able to do in your past life?”

Xu Yunchun: “Isn’t that exactly what I’m doing?”

Wei Xiu: “Doing what?”

Xu Yunchun: “Dating you doing it with you!”

Wei Xiu’s face suddenly turns red: “That’s all you ever think about.”

–

Xu Yunchun sees Wei Xiu with a serious expression on his face, he knows there would be no use throwing an unreasonable fit, so he just pouts: “Chunchun just wants to cuddle with his young master. Chunchun can’t be without his young master.”

Xu Yunchun’s voice softens, and Wei Xiu falters a bit, but through staggering willpower he holds back: “But you can’t cuddle with me all day, that’s too unreasonable.”

Xu Yunchun: “Since you want to be so persistent. Then I’ll invent a tool that will detect that I wish to touch you, it will shock. How’s that?”

Wei Xiu: “…”

Wei Xiu: “…increase the strength of the shock, at a level that will encourage the perpetrator not to act again.”

Xu Yunchun: “But the person I plan to shock is you.”

Wei Xiu: “I know, that’s why I asked you to increase the shock strength.”

Chunchun transgresses, young master suffers the shock, Chunchun feels bad, Chunchun corrects his behavior. It was all so well structured, and so logical.

–

Wei Xiu understands Xu Yunchun too well.

As he expects, Xu Yunchun feels terrible imagining the young master getting shocked, the young master punishing machine was so easily thwarted.

Xu Yunchun depressively says: “Establish some rules, young master.”

Wei Xiu thinks deeply for a bit, then says, seriously: “From now on, the time you cuddle with me, including hanging from my body, sitting on my lap , suspending from my shoulder, and sitting on my waist, must be restricted to four hours a day.”

Xu Yunchun is stunned: “four hours?”

Four hours? He didn’t hear wrong?

“Four hours? You’re being too stingy!” Xu Yunchun yells.

“There’s 24 hours in a day, eight hours to sleep and eight hours at school leaves only 8 hours to interact!” He was upset beyond belief, “Only four hours of cuddling out of eight! Why not just throw me away while you’re at it!”

Wei Xiu long expected this type of reaction from Xu Yunchun, but he held strong: “The time is short, bear with it.”

Xu Yunchun: “You can bear with it?”

Wei Xiu: “What can’t I bear with? I bore it for a year after you died.”

Of course, Wei Xiu withholds the reality of him eventually no longer being able to bear it and committing suicide.”

–

With things having already reached this point, Xu Yunchun can only accept it. The change is a big hit to him, he desperately needs comfort from the young master.

But right when he nestles into Wei Xiu’s embrace, Wei Xiu says: “Time starts now.”

Xu Yunchun: “Can you not ruin the mood?”

Wei Xiu shuts up.

Xu Yunchun: “Nevermind, I won’t waste any time.”

Xu Yunchun turns his body around and sits on Wei Xiu’s waist: “Let’s see how much time my dear young master who’s ever so time-conscious will spend on knotting today.”

Wei Xiu: “Be quiet!”

Xu Yunchun’s movements are fast, he doesn’t waste even a second. But, just a minute later, he suddenly lifts his head: “Wait a minute.”

Wei Xiu: “?”

Xu Yunchun: “You know? When a man is unable to perform as well as he wants to, he usually likes to bring up forced reasoning as an excuse.”

Wei Xiu: “??”

Xu Yunchun: “Young master, be honest, are you…impotent?”

Wei Xiu: “???”

Xu Yunchun: “Don’t worry, I can create a prescription for you.”

Wei Xiu: “Just you wait!”

On the very first day the house rule was established, out of a desperate need to prove himself, Young master Wei abolished that very house rule himself.