Chapter 22.2 – Shiitake

The two of them talked till they reached the next room. 

Xiaolan the shiitake was huddling in the corner and looked at the two uninvited guests with his pretty eyes when they stepped in. 

Long Junhao pondered for a moment before squatting in front of Xiaolan and asked in a serious tone: “Hello, little shiitake, we are the staff of the China Shiitake Department. We are now going to do a survey on China’s shiitake mushrooms. First question, what was your previous growth environment?” He added, “If you don’t cooperate, it will be with our deepest regrets that we remove you from the list and from then on, you will no longer be a shiitake.”

Xiaolan the shiitake was flabbergasted. “Noo!! I am a shiitake!! I’ll answer everything you ask!” He did not expect that the other party’s backing would be so powerful. Gu Chen felt that Xiaolan would even hand over his own ancestors.

Investigator Long Junhao coughed. “Answer the question first.”

The little shiitake obediently complied, “I lived in a very big house, it’s bigger and more luxurious than this one.”

“So he’s very rich,” Long Junhao muttered to himself before continuing, “do you know the person that usually waters and fertilizes you?”

He recalled for a moment. “There’s quite a lot.”

“Tell me about the one with the highest status,” Long Junhao coaxed, “Like his surname or what others call him.”

“Oh,” the little shiitake nodded his head cooperatively. His eyes looked up at the ceiling while thinking and he feebly said, “Some call him Boss, some call him Brother Yan…”

Satisfied with his answer, Long Junhao patted the shiitake’s head. He praised, “After investigating, it looks like you are growing extremely well. We have decided to award you the ‘First-Class Mushroom’ medal.” 

Immediately, Long Junhao’s hand was grasped by the extremely moved shiitake. “Really, thank you so much, mushroom staff!” 

Long Junhao: “…You’re welcome.”

Gu Chen had black lines on his face. “Exactly what sort of medal is a ‘First-Class Mushroom’ medal?”

“Who knows, maybe it can be sold for a good price.” Long Junhao got up and turned around to face him, “Look, I’ve asked already. He really is one of Lei Yan’s men.”

“…” Gu Chen remained silent, his eyes twitching. He would’ve never thought to find out Xiaolan’s identity by asking like this. Could this actually be the experience Long Junhao accumulated from always interacting with those creatures? 

Long Junhao lightly nudged Gu Chen. “Your turn. Do you have any good ideas to bring out his other personality?”

Gu Chen cracked his knuckles and walked forward. “Hit him till he faints.” 

Long Junhao: “…”

“That’s a good idea. Are you able to do it?” 

“Of course.” And with that, Gu Chen’s terrifyingly accurate hand met it’s target. 

The little shiitake immediately fell forward but at that moment when he was about to touch the ground, he suddenly did a flip and landed on two feet. He lifted his head up and gazed at the two of them with cold eyes. 

Long Junhao rubbed his eyes in disbelief, and rubbed his eyes again. “This… this is amazing…” 

Before he could say another word, Long Junhao was pulled behind by Gu Chen and his view was blocked. Gu Chen calmly stared at ‘Xiaolan’. The new ‘Xiaolan’ rubbed his neck and muttered, “How merciless.”

Instead of being wary, Long Junhao was actually more interested in the new ‘Xiaolan’ and poked his head out from behind Gu Chen. “Hello, I am Long Junhao. Ever since I heard that you ate that slut, my respect and admiration for you has grown like a surging river, strong and endless.”

“Ah, you exaggerate.” ‘Xiaolan’ covered his right fist with his left hand in salute. “I am also familiar with the exalted Brother Long’s name.”

Long Junhao returned the salute: “May I ask for your honorable name?” 

“This one’s surname is Yu. Given name is Ao. People call me Xiaolan.”

Long Junhao smiled, “Ah, so you are Brother Yu. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Your prince feels that we have already become best friends at the first meeting, why not go for a drink with me?”

“It would be impolite of me to decline.”

“Very good, very good. It’s settled then.” 

Gu Chen massaged his forehead. “Please stop…. hello….” 

Yu Ao kept his cynical smile and turned his gaze towards him. “Anyway, you’ve been suspicious of me since the first day I came so there’s no point in hiding.”

“You’re indeed very calm.” Gu Chen remarked. “What did Lei Yan ask you to do?” 

“He only asked me to find a way to infiltrate here to get familiar with the situation and secretly observe this prince.” Yu Ao didn’t mind telling them everything. “I’m currently waiting and preparing for the second phase.” He smirked and added, “Anyway, with the current situation, the person with the ‘He’ surname won’t discharge me so I have plenty of time to wait around.”

Long Junhao also smiled. “So that means you won’t do anything to me?”

“Yes for the time being.”

“That’s great,” Long Junhao wrapped his arm over Yu Ao’s shoulders, “Come, let us go and have a drink, but before that, you have to see that slut. He told me he has something to settle with you.”

“Then while I’m at it, I’ll make him angry again.”

“No problem, I’ll watch.”

“…” The corner of Gu Chen’s mouth twitched as he watched them leave.

He took a deep breath to calm himself and then followed.

Li Xuan looked amazed to see them walking in peacefully and couldn’t help glancing a few more times their way.

Long Junhao also felt amazed. No, it was better to say that he was shocked instead. Because standing in the middle of the room was a person clad in Taoist robes with a wooden sword on his back, one hand holding prayer beads and the other holding a vertical flag with the words ‘Subduing Spirits and Purging Demons’ on it.

“…Chu Jian?” 

Li Xuan corrected him. “He should be called Taoist Master Chu now.”

“…How did this happen?” Long Junhao’s brain was in shock.

Luo Yi, who was beside Li Xuan, smiled and explained. “Yesterday, genius doctor Chu said that there were too many ghosts wailing so he decided to perform the ancestral rites to prevent harm from falling onto the people here.” In fact, the truth was that after Luo Yi taught CPR to Chu Jian, he had been using this skill to help other people. So Luo Yi had wanted him to stop doing this. And it just happened that yesterday, there were too many beds and incense sticks. Luo Yi had come up with a bright idea and thus, this was the result. A generation of miracle doctors had fallen and a generation of conmen rose from then on.

Taoist Master Chu turned to look at Luo Yi. He pinched his fingers and counted. “Die without descendants.”

Luo Yi chuckled. “I’ll willingly die without descendants. In this life, being with Taoist Master Chu is enough for me.” 

Everyone else had black lines on their heads.

Taoist Master Chu then turned to look at the person on the bed and did the same action. “Die without descendants.”

He Tianfan roared. “For what reason?!”

Taoist Master Chu didn’t bother answering and continued pinching fingers and counting. After telling everyone in the room that they will die without descendants, with a wave of his vertical flag, he left. Yu Ao pointed to himself. “…Why was I included?”

“…” Long Junhao replied, “How would I know? I was also included.”

He Tianfan got angry when he saw Yu Ao. “Serves you right! You deserve to have no descendants! I curse you to die with no descendants!”

Yu Ao turned to look at him with an evil smile on his face. “Of course, I have you already so there’s no way I’ll have children. You don’t have to remind me.” As he finished speaking, he walked towards He Tianfan. The hair on He Tianfan’s body all stood up. “You…What are you planning to do?!”

Yu Ao slowly undid the buttons on his shirt. “Of course, it’s to strengthen our feelings for each other. Ladies and gentlemen, there are conflicts within the family.“

Everyone understood and began to move out of the room.

This angered He Tianfan further. “You all, don’t go!!! Help me!! I’m still injured!!”

Taoist Master Chu who hadn’t gone far heard the commotion and pinched his fingers to count again. “When a scum who abuses meets a scum who wants to be abused, nothing in the world can defeat them.”

Everyone took a step back and looked at the taoist master in horror.

The prince was silent for a while before he slowly came to a conclusion. “The transformation this time was really successful.”

“…”