Translator: ChuRen/ YuQiChen
“My lord, do you intend to capture it and make it the Fourth Asura1Malevolent Spirit?” Su Ling swung his tail and asked.
The Ghost King mischievously pinched Su Ling’s tail and gave a vague “hm.”
Su Ling looked at the great white shark, hesitating to speak: “But, as an Asura, isn’t it…”
The species a bit… unsuitable?
Sheng Ze paused his idle thoughts and finally snapped back, understanding what Su Ling was implying.
When the Enforcement Hall was established, its structure was set: led by the Ghost King, it had four Asuras under him. Over the years, the other three Asuras diligently worked, and their red, blue, and white representations have become firmly ingrained in people’s minds.
But the last vacancy for the fourth Asura had yet to be filled.
Actually, Sheng Ze’s initial idea was simple: capture someone strong for the Enforcement Hall and maybe tease Su Ling a little—nothing complicated.
However, after Su Ling’s remark, Sheng Ze suddenly felt tempted.
His hand stroked the little dolphin’s back again and again, openly daydreaming—the idea of the fourth Asura being some kind of shark sounded strangely thrilling???
“Great White Shark, I ask you, why have you disturbed the human world?” Since the thought had arisen, Sheng Ze became serious, needing to carefully interrogate the shark’s character.
Surrounded by the Ghost King’s dark energy, the shark lowered his head in submission and said, “I only made a few batches of buns using genuine seafood ingredients. How have I disturbed the human world?”
To be honest, the great white shark felt wronged—he just liked making buns. How did it come to the point where piranhas were biting him?
Even the fight with Su Ling was because Chang Bai disrupted the scene first.
Sheng Ze remained noncommittal and asked, “If you’re using normal ingredients, why do people say the buns taste good after eating them?”
The great white shark angrily replied, “Because I make them delicious!”
Recalling the bun-eating scene, Sheng Ze twitched the corner of his mouth and felt a headache: “Nonsense.”
“They’re obviously delicious; you just don’t appreciate it,” the shark muttered discontentedly. “I only added a tiny bit of poppy.”
Sheng Ze tugged his ear: “What did you say?”
The great white shark said confidently, “Poppy! Mixing poppy pollen with talisman paper creates a magical effect when ingested.”
Sheng Ze: …
He tapped Su Ling’s back with his finger thoughtfully: “What kind of talisman paper did you mix?”
It’s one thing to make mortals obsessed with the buns, but to actually have the power to turn ghosts into little ocean creatures too!
“It’s nothing really, just something ocean animals eat when they’re born. Calculated out, it’s basically… milk powder?” The great white shark was just as puzzled.
Su Ling and the other ghosts fell silent instantly.
Sheng Ze wisely skipped over this topic. Whatever effect the poppy flower combined with “milk powder” might have, it could wait until the great white shark reached the Underworld to be explained.
“Enough, White Shark, I ask you, are you willing to come with me to the Underworld?” the Ghost King lowered his gaze and asked.
The great white shark looked at Su Ling obediently lying in the Ghost King’s hands, hesitated for a moment, then refused: “My only wish is along the path of fine dining.”
Meng Xiaoman and Shi Kongzang both cast admiring looks at the great white shark.
—A true warrior!
Daring to face the threat of authority.
Daring to reject the Ghost King’s request.
The Ghost King wasn’t too angry but pondered for a long time before suddenly saying, “If you join the Enforcement Hall, I guarantee nobody in the Underworld will dare not eat your buns.”
The surrounding ghosts: ???
A smile appeared on the great white shark’s face, and without hesitation, he bowed deeply: “I am willing to heed the Ghost King’s orders!”
It was well known that the Underworld was overcrowded, with millions of souls. One bun per meal per person meant at least three million buns a day—and in a year…
The great white shark couldn’t help but show a happy smile.
At the same time, King Yama, who was busy handling official documents in the Underworld, suddenly felt a chill down his spine and sneezed.
……
Before leaving, the Ghost King suddenly glanced at Shi Kongzang thoughtfully for a few seconds.
Shi Kongzang: ?
The Ghost King chuckled softly and looked at Su Ling: “I’m still short one Asura.”
Su Ling nodded. He already knew about this.
The Ghost King remained shrouded in dark energy, his face unclear, but his tone carried a hint of teasing: “The White Shark may not be suitable.”
Su Ling nodded again, indicating he was aware of this as well.
“So…” The Ghost King paused briefly, then finally revealed his ultimate aim, “I see that monk under your command is very suitable. I wonder if Boss Su would be willing to part with him?”
Su Ling: Hm?
Shi Kongzang: Huh?!
Su Ling glanced awkwardly at Shi Kongzang.
Shi Kongzang’s teary eyes met his, his body trembling and ink spurting out in bursts, full of a plea for help.
Su Ling looked again at the hand patting his head and decisively betrayed, “Willing, willing. It’s his good fortune if Kongzang wins your favour.”
Shi Kongzang: …
The Ghost King hooked a finger under the dolphin’s chin and smiled softly, “Good boy.”
Shi Kongzang shivered silently.
Before leaving, the Ghost King asked the great white shark to restore everyone to their original forms, then mounted the shark’s plump body and shot swiftly into the depths.
Shi Kongzang wore a bitter expression and begged Sheng Ze, “Ghost King, that was all Bai Wuchang’s idea…”
Sheng Ze raised an eyebrow, puzzled, “What idea?”
You know, the one about bullying you when you turned into a crab!
But Shi Kongzang dared not mention the Ghost King’s embarrassing past again.
Sheng Ze sneered and reassured, “Don’t worry. You, Xiaoman, Black and White Wuchang, and Wu Pan—I won’t leave any of you out.”
(Wu Pan: What does that have to do with me???)
Shi Kongzang instantly pulled a sour face.
Sheng Ze glanced at him, his coldness slightly retreating, and said, “Don’t you want to return to the Underworld to save the wicked ghosts?”
Shi Kongzang was stunned, speechless.
Last time, Sheng Ze had impressed everyone in the Underworld by using Buddhist teachings to save countless wicked ghosts. Since then, Shi Kongzang had gained insight and recovered his previous compassion, so he did indeed want to try going back to the Underworld.
Sheng Ze gave him a tip: “What didn’t work before may still work now. When you face difficulties, think more about Wu Pan and me.”
Shi Kongzang was full of question marks: “What do you mean?”
Sheng Ze said calmly, “When it’s something you can solve with words, think of Wu Pan; when it’s something you have to solve with fists, think of me.”
Shi Kongzang instantly understood.
—Learn Wu Pan’s art of verbal sparring, and learn Sheng Ze’s bullying methods.
With this two-pronged approach, combining both brains and brawn, plus the successful precedent of spiritual salvation, there shouldn’t be any more problems.
Yeah, that’s basically what Sheng Ze meant.
After a while, he tossed Shi Kongzang and the great white shark into the Enforcement Hall and hurried back behind Su Ling.
Meng Xiaoman surrounded Su Ling, gossiping, “Boss, what exactly is your relationship with the Ghost King?”
Su Ling mumbled vaguely, “Fan and idol?”
Meng Xiaoman didn’t believe it and pressed, “Then if you had to choose between the Ghost King and Sheng Ze?”
Sheng Ze quietly perked up his ears.
Su Ling thought for a moment, half-laughing and half-crying, “There’s no way to choose.”
“No way! Imagine it’s just the Ghost King and Sheng Ze left in the world; you must pick a companion. Who do you choose?” Meng Xiaoman persisted.
Su Ling stroked his chin, hesitating: “Then… Sheng Ze, I guess.”
Sheng Ze raised an eyebrow, a hint of triumph appearing at the corner of his eyes.
Meng Xiaoman didn’t even bother to look at the magnificent peacock-like display and curiously asked, “Why?”
“I just have a deep admiration for the Ghost King…”
Su Ling’s gaze lightly swept over Sheng Ze, then suddenly revealed a smile: “Also, I still don’t even know what the Ghost King looks like. What if his appearance… is unusual?”
Meng Xiaoman didn’t dare say anything more.
—Boss, you really do have guts!
Sheng Ze’s face darkened immediately as he stormed ahead alone in anger.
Su Ling tried to hold back a laugh, then suddenly said, “No, I still choose the Ghost King.”
Meng Xiaoman: “Why?!”
Boss, how can you be so fickle!
Sheng Ze’s pace involuntarily slowed down, waiting to hear more.
Su Ling said seriously, “Ksitigarbha doesn’t seem to be able to beat the Ghost King.”
How superficial!
Can the charm of a ghost be judged purely by strength?
Sheng Ze thought indignantly.
Su Ling wasn’t done. He licked the corner of his lips and added, “Besides, I’ve known the Ghost King longer. Both emotionally and logically, the Ghost King still seems better.”
How foolish!
Can feelings between ghosts be measured by time?
Sheng Ze continued grumbling inside.
Su Ling smiled at Xiaoman, “Of course, my admiration for the Ghost King is endless like a flowing river. I truly dare not harbour any such thoughts… Let’s keep this joke private; if the Ghost King hears it, he’d probably hold you accountable.”
Sheng Ze bitterly sighed.
—Hearing him defend the “Ghost King” like this just puts me in a weird mood. What to do?!
Suddenly, Su Ling called out, “A-ze, what do you say?”
Sheng Ze: …Say what?
“Are you hoping I choose you, or the Ghost King?” Su Ling tilted his head innocently and asked.
Sheng Ze: …
Only then did he realise this question was a trap!
If he chose “Ghost King,” he wouldn’t be happy. Would he be happy if he chose “Sheng Ze” instead?
Sheng Ze felt like he was about to have a heart attack from anger.
Su Ling smiled, lowered his gaze, and concealed a flicker of contemplation in his eyes.
On the very night the great white shark arrived in the Underworld, the Underworld Forum exploded.
1L: The Enforcement Hall’s fourth Asura is actually a shark…!
2L: Forget the shark, it’s got a bald monk who’s always chanting sutras around it, saying he’ll save every ghost he catches. Who can stand that?
3L: More unbearable than the chanting… can you imagine the feeling of being forced to carry a bun by the Enforcement Hall while walking down the street? At that moment, I felt the terror of being controlled by Meng Po all over again.
4L: Buns? They’re handing out buns too?? Has the Enforcement Hall turned into a cafeteria?
5L: I understand 3L’s feeling. 4L, this is really hard to explain. Walk around the Enforcement Hall a few times and you’ll get it.
…
NL: I’m 4L, I’m back. I get it now. [Crying intensely.jpg]
Every ghost in the Underworld remembered a certain thunderstorm at midnight when the new Top Ten Killing Weapons list was freshly released, becoming the deepest nightmare in every ghost’s heart.
For several nights in a row, half the ghosts trapped in nightmares kept muttering, “I don’t want to be saved, I don’t want to be saved,” while the other half incessantly mumbled, “I don’t eat buns, I don’t eat buns.”
The scene was, to say the least, very harmonious.
King Yama paused his writing, looking at the flourishing (??) state of the Underworld and at Shi Kongzang, who obviously came back wiser (??) from his outing, and muttered with satisfaction, “Looks like from now on, interning at Su Ling’s company should be the primary training for joining the Underworld.”
Author’s note: 【Mini Theatre 】
Meng Xiaoman: Welcome to the “Choose, Choose, Choose” segment! Today’s guest—Su Ling. Boss Su, if you had to choose between Sheng Ze and the Ghost King as employees, who would you pick?
Su Ling: The Ghost King.
Meng Xiaoman: Wu Pan or the Judge?
Su Ling: The Judge.
Meng Xiaoman: The Chang brothers or Black and White Wuchang?
Su Ling: The Black and White Wuchang.
Meng Xiaoman: Xiaoman or Meng Po?
Su Ling: …I choose you.
Meng Xiaoman (delighted): Only I got picked~~~
King Yama: …This motherf*cking idiot!!!
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