Chapter 58.1 – Tastes Like Mint

translator: xiin
editors: butter & XavierForest

Going to the Internet cafe had been a whimsical decision on Song Yu’s part, and his mind wasn’t on the game.

The scenery inside the game was vivid and detailed, done in a very shocking, old style. He controlled the little loli to wander around.

There were some small monsters and mini bosses on the way along the River of Forgetfulness. Their healths weren’t high and they could be easily killed, but the team was quite dissatisfied with the little physician loli who was acting like she was out for a stroll.

[Team] Glazed Glass Lamp: ? Physician.

[Team] Crazy Bloodthirsty Little Master: Healer, don’t run around, okay? You don’t need to do anything, just follow us. Really, after failing so many times, it’s always because we run into this kind of person.

Ma Xiaoding spoke, “Wow, Brother Yu, they’re talking about you.”

Song Yu: “I’m not blind.”

Ma Xiaoding thought about the idea that Song Yu had given him the last time they’d played games and suggested, “Do you want to act cute to them?”

Song Yu glanced at him, “I thought you would have me start flaming them directly.”

Ma Xiaoding: “??? Don’t do that. Look at how lovely you look in the game. Your name’s so cute, too.”

Song Yu ignored him and typed out a full stop in the team chat to show that he’d received the message before following the team. Although he’d come to coast, he didn’t want to be too much of a salted fish.

They finally arrived at the entrance leading to the boss as they went further into the map.

Ma Xiaoding spoke from beside him, “When the boss uses its skills, there’ll be an array on the ground. Brother Yu, you should pay attention to your positioning. Also, be careful of her little demons. This is the most disgusting part of the Red Lotus instance; if you’re touched by their vines, you’ll be controlled, and your cooldowns will slow down.”

The instance boss emerged from the magma. Her upper body was human, and she had the lower body of a snake. She looked sinister, and there was a pile of little red lotus demons under her body, their mouths open to reveal their fangs and claws dancing everywhere.

It was a fifteen-person instance and their groups were split seven-eight. Although it was a temporary team, both sides had their own commanders. On their side, they were all relying on Ma Xiaoding’s shouting.

Song Yu stayed away from Xie Sui in order to keep their accounts’ identities as lovers hidden. He locked ‘hand in hand’ with another swordsman who wasn’t from their group. However, it had to be said that this man’s operations were so rotten that it made his eyes hurt. His equipment was clearly pretty good, but he couldn’t deal any damage at all. His positioning was crappy, he couldn’t land his skills well, and he even got controlled from time to time.

The speed at which his health dropped exceeded the speed at which he could heal, which made him grow so angry that he began to flame the other party.

[Team] Dragon Under Heaven: I give up. Are you sleepwalking? Are your hands broken? Do you know how to use skills?

[Team] Dragon Under Heaven: Get lost. Don’t follow Laozi. You’re just a waste.

The people who originally already had opinions about Song Yu spoke up.

[Team] Crazy Bloodthirsty Little Master: What else can you expect from a girl?

Ma Xiaoding was the first to get angry and used voice-to-text to send out a message.

[Team] Sadako Tied To The Hazelnut Tree: Who’s a waste?! Do you know to read the strategy when you do an instance? It’s pretty amazing for a swordsman to be able to play as badly as you.

[Team] Dragon Under Heaven: Why don’t you take a look at the girl you took along? That cheap, brain-damaged thing who only knows to yingyingying?

The corners of Song Yu’s lips tugged down. He raised his eyebrows and untied the ‘hand in hand’ bond with this stupid person. Inside the game, the little loli in green held her lamp and flew to the swordsman in white.

After the ‘hand in hand’ skill finished its cooldown and was used again, the little loli sat on his shoulder. There was a clear line of text above her head, ‘Can I Kiss You?’.

Xie Sui’s lips curved in a brief smile. What happened to staying far away?

[Team] Go Clear Monsters First: You’re back?

Song Yu had been crowned with the label of ‘only knows how to yingyingying’ and didn’t try to shirk it. His expression was indifferent as he typed.

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: He’s so fierce, I’m so scared

He had the intention of disgusting that noob to death.

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: Yingyingying, this one¹this one – he’s referring to himself in third person is just noob but likes to play qaq

The group of people from No.1 High: “……”

[Team] Dragon Under Heaven: F*ck

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: His health dropped so fast. As long as there’s a skill where he’ll lose health, he’ll go and get hit with it. This one was too busy [covers face]

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: Is it my fault? [index fingers pointing together]

[Team] Go Clear Monsters First: No, he’s the noob

“……” Dragon Under Heaven wanted to curse people. But soon, the boss’s eighth health bar was beaten down, and she began to go crazy. The damage from the formation exploded and he was too busy.

There was a physician on their side as well, and their main skill was a group heal. However, this physician’s positioning wasn’t very good and they were often entangled by the little demons, causing them to lose their cooldowns. This made that group of people instantly realize what it meant to have their health bars perform a vanishing act.

Ma Xiaoding looked at the eight of them who were basically wiped out and felt quite good about it in his heart, but he was also very worried. “F*ck, f*ck, f*ck, are we done for? The boss still hasn’t used her ultimate move! When her tail comes out of the lava, that’s when she’ll start using it.”

Song Yu: “It’s still early.”

Following Xie Sui was much better than going with that noob. This pair of couple accounts were high-leveled, had good equipment, and explosive damage. He felt that Xie Sui’s pile of messy old part-time jobs may also have included helping others play their accounts. Otherwise, why was he so good at playing games? In this kind of instance that was filled with traps, he’d never once gotten caught. He was even able to predict the timing for the boss’s ultimate move, manipulating the swordsman in white to bypass the bloody rain and cut down the last of her health with his sword.

The boss roared. Her health bar was empty and huge, scarlet numbers came out before she sank back into the magma. A lot of top-notch equipment flew out.

Ma Xiaoding was almost about to smash down on his keyboard, “F*ck me! God Xie is really inhuman!”

Crazy Bloodthirsty Little Master and Dragon Under Heaven chose silence.

One of the girls from the team sent out a message.

[Team] Young Green Vines: Amazing

[Team] Young Green Vines: Swordsman big brother qwq, can I add you as a friend?

[Team] Sadako Tied To The Hazelnut Tree: ? Don’t you see their couples names?

[Team] Young Green Vines: Eh? I’m sorry, I didn’t realize [shy][shy] but I just want to be friends and have this big god take me along. The big sister physician on the other side shouldn’t mind, right?

Ma Xiaoding: “Wow! God Xie, why is your luck in love so good no matter where you go?”

In fact, Song Yu was also lamenting this. Was this a heartthrob physique that attracted everyone?

There were some people who felt that the situation wasn’t chaotic enough and kicked up a fuss, “Wow, Brother Yu, she’s going after your boyfriend!”

Song Yu: “??? ……”

Xie Sui chuckled lightly from beside him.

[Team] Go Clear Monsters First: They won’t mind, but they’re hard to coax

[Team] Young Green Vines: Ah? Is big sister physician so petty?

[Team] Young Green Vines: qaq Then, I’ve been rejected. I’m hurt and want a hug

Song Yu’s lips curved down. Little sister, you’re going a bit overboard.

There was a hug action in the game, but it was limited to those who were already friends in the game. It was clear that she still wanted to become friends.

[Team] Young Green Vines: A hug? Just one [blink]

Song Yu briefly entered the role. If it was this account’s owner herself playing, how annoyed would she be when she saw a girl act cute and spoiled towards her boyfriend right in front of her face like this?

[Team] The Next No.1 High School Grass: …… I’m amazed. They’re a match made in heaven, what are you doing acting crazy over here.

[Team] Sadako Tied To The Hazelnut Tree: Acting cute? Who can’t do it?

[Team] Sadako Tied To The Hazelnut Tree: qwq Can you hug me?

After the whole group of them spoke up and messed around.

[Team] Go Clear Monsters First: No, baby’s going to get angry 🙂

Song Yu had come up with a cute girl character profile and was laughing non-stop as he casually followed the script.

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: Hmph!!!

[Team] Can I Kiss You?: You’re not allowed to hug them. You can only hug me [cry][cry]

[Team] Go Clear Monsters First: Come to my arms first

“……”

Song Yu suddenly felt a little embarrassed. Hadn’t they performed this act before?

[…………]

The group of people who’d been as quiet as chickens all felt like they’d eaten a pile of dog food.

[Team] Let The Heavens Make Arrangements: I’m just playing a game, why do I have to suffer this kind of torture.

[Team] kiss: Burp, I’m full.

Ma Xiaoding couldn’t stop laughing. He was just about to type when the whole Internet cafe suddenly fell into darkness.

Their computer screens turned black and the lights went off.

Voices sounded from all directions in the Internet cafe, swearing and cursing.

“F*ck me! Laozi’s pentakill!”

“What’s going on! Why is there a sudden blackout?”

The boss spoke appeasingly from the front, “Linqing Street has been undergoing renovations recently. Maybe the construction team broke a cable. I’ll go ask.”

Someone shouted loudly, “How long will it take?”

Boss: “It’ll take an hour or two to fix, but it might just be a tripped fuse. I’ll go have a look first. Everyone, please remain calm.”

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  this one – he’s referring to himself in third person