Chapter 20.2 – Panic

After seeing the ice sculptures, Feng Yeran and Xiao Zhijie walked on the pedestrian street.

Many couples were walking here, all of them hugging each other and holding hands.

Xiao Zhijie came to take Feng Yeran’s hand, but Feng Yeran dodged. “Brother Xiao, you’re not trying to play gay with me, are you?”

“It’s just holding hands. What’s all the fuss!”

“I suddenly feel a bit cold.”

Xiao Zhijie took off his coat and put it over the two of them. Their shoulders were against each other. “Still cold?”

Feng Yeran laughed. “Are you an elementary school student?”

Xiao Zhijie caught his hand. “No one can see now.”

The two of them joked all the way home, giving Feng Yeran the illusion of being back in high school. Xiao Zhijie had always been like this, taller than Feng Yeran, stronger than Feng Yeran, with short trendy hair and a single earring. In high school, due to Chen Xuan and family matters, he’d been very dejected. Thankfully, this friend had always been by Feng Yeran’s side.

Xiao Zhijie’s home was much larger than he’d imagined, worthy of being a rich second generation.

“House prices over here are so expensive. You’ve got almost 200 ping1661 square metres here. It’s just hateful!”

“I just casually bought it. If you like, why don’t you just stay here?”

“If I stay here, what wife will you marry?”

“How about marrying you?”


“Yeran, I sit here watching TV by myself every day. How lonely it is. I often imagine you in an apron cooking me dinner in the kitchen.”

“You’re thinking big.”

“No clothes under the apron.”


“When I come home, you say to me, ‘Brother Xiao, would you like to shower first, or have dinner first, or eat me first?’”

“…I’m straight.”

“I mean it.”

Feng Yeran was embarrassed. “Don’t make jokes like that… Besides, don’t you feel awkward making jokes like that as a straight adult man?!”

“I mean it! I’m only like this to you!”

Xiao Zhijie suddenly hugged Feng Yeran and said in his ear, “Yeran, I’ve endured it for many years, but now I have to tell you, I like you! It’s true! I’ve liked you since high school! But at that time, you only had Chen Xuan in your eyes… But now, with Chen Xuan gone, I wonder if I’ve got a chance!”

Feng Yeran was stunned. “It’s really not a punishment game?”

“It’s true! The reason I came back to China this time was for you, and being an idle person in the institute was to stay with you more!”

Feng Yeran suddenly thought of what Feng Hua had said to him: “Stay away from him. He has plans for you.” He didn’t believe it at that time.

“But… I’m straight.” Feng Yeran was embarrassed.

“You will love me!”

With that, Xiao Zhijie went up and kissed Feng Yeran on the corner of his lips, scalding hot.

Feng Yeran got goosebumps. He immediately stood up. “Brother Xiao! Are you forcing me to leave?! I really can’t accept it…”

“Sorry, I was too hurried. I’ll let you take your time accepting me!”

In the bathroom, Feng Yeran felt very sorry for Xiao Zhijie.

Xiao Zhijie really treated him very well.

It was just a kiss from him, but he actually felt uncomfortable all over. He had washed the corner of his mouth so many times his skin had started to turn red and peel.

Looking at it that way, he was still very straight.

However, kissing Feng Hua was totally different. There would be no feeling of disgust. Not only no disgust, but…

Feng Yeran shook his head. After the emotions of shame had passed, what came up were endless worries.

He admitted that he was a coward. The first thing he’d do when he encountered something difficult to accept was often to run away.

This time, he had run away for several days.

Every day, whenever he was free, he’d be lost in his thoughts, recalling again and again what he’d seen that day, the surveillance video that’d shocked him immensely—he had followed Xiao Zhijie’s suggestion and installed cameras in the bedroom, living room and study of his home.

He didn’t know how to face Feng Hua at all. All, every piece of evidence, told him that Feng Hua was very dangerous, that it was extremely likely Feng Hua was the murderer. But he couldn’t accept the fact that Feng Hua was the murderer. He didn’t know how he should react. Confirm with him countless times? Make him admit that he was the murderer? Argue with him? Punish him? Hate him? But Feng Hua himself didn’t even know the truth—he couldn’t bear to hand Feng Hua over to the police, let alone a sanatorium. Bringing him back to the research institute was the right decision. But what should he do now? Should he go and take care of him? But once he stayed with him, he’d think of terrible things and have terrible dreams!

He really didn’t know what to do at all.

But, no matter what, he had to face it. Tomorrow, he had to go see Feng Hua tomorrow.

* * *

In fact, the next day, he got off work very late from cultivating the new embryo. It was already eleven by the time he arrived at Feng Hua’s place.

When he opened the door, he didn’t see Feng Hua come to greet him like a big dog. The somewhat empty room was dark and even smelled musty from being left unventilated for a long time. The heating wasn’t on and it was cold.

“Feng Hua?” Feng Yeran turned on the light and called out softly.

“You’re here.” It was a calm voice.

Feng Hua was sitting on the old sofa with a pale face. The moment Feng Yeran saw Feng Hua, he suddenly forgot what he’d been struggling with these days and felt a sense of relief. Sleepiness came over him. After all, he hadn’t slept very well these days.

“Are you getting used to living here?”

“It’s okay.”

“Did you sleep on the sofa? Why didn’t you sleep on the bed?”

Feng Hua didn’t answer him. He just asked, “Have you been with Xiao Zhijie all these days?”

“Just yesterday and the day before. He’s still the same, very interesting and knowing all kinds of fun places. Yesterday, I went with him to the pedestrian street to see ice sculptures, light shows and such. It was pretty good.”

Feng Yeran sat next to Feng Hua and lay comfortably on the sofa. He yawned. “Ah, so sleepy.”

“You didn’t sleep well at his home?”


“Did you sleep with him?”

“…” Feng Yeran sensed Feng Hua’s tone was a little off.

He turned his head and found Feng Hua staring right at him. When he looked closer, he realised that Feng Hua’s eyes had a lot of red blood in them. Those clear eyes had become dark and obscure at that moment, with a thick blackness under them, and his lips were dry.

Before Feng Yeran could answer, he heard laughter.

Low and mocking.

Cold fingers ran across his cheek and lifted his jaw.

It was too cold. Feng Yeran suddenly thought of the dead Chen Xuan with the same temperature. He couldn’t help but dodge.

But Feng Hua didn’t let him go. He pinched Feng Yeran’s jaw and raised the corners of his mouth, only to ask with little expression, “What, did he make you that comfortable? You’re already unwilling to be touched by me now?”

Feng Yeran didn’t understand for a moment. “What’re you talking about?”

Feng Hua’s cold fingers were like the antennae of an insect, slowly sliding from Feng Yeran’s forehead to his cheek, and then gently pressing his lips. “Which parts… of you did he kiss?”

He tilted his head slightly. “Forehead? Cheeks? Lips? Did he put his tongue in?”

“Shut up!”

“Huh, are you shy? Your ears are all red… Is that the expression you had in front of him? That’s how you looked at him after he confessed to you, right? Then, you let him kiss you to his heart’s content and possess you…”

“I… ah!”

Before Feng Yeran could retort, he was pinned down on the sofa by Feng Hua.

Feng Hua’s lips followed the curve of Feng Yeran’s jaw, slowly moving down.

He was speaking without expression, his breath and his slightly long curls slowly sliding over Feng Yeran’s skin, tickling it a little.

His hands almost crudely slipped into Feng Yeran’s thin sweater, every inch of skin that his palms slid over shuddering and almost immediately turning red. As his breath slid over Feng Yeran’s left nipple, groans almost uncontrollably came out of Feng Yeran’s throat.

“I haven’t even sucked it yet and you’re like this… Did he make you so sensitive? Ye’er, how many times have you two done it?”

A strong sense of shame surged up and transformed into anger.

Feng Yeran pushed Feng Hua away, grabbed his things and went to the bedroom. He slammed the door and locked it.

Feng Hua collapsed on the sofa, tilting his head back and covering his eyes with the back of his hand.

His shoulders were shaking slightly, and he didn’t know whether he was laughing or crying.

Feng Yeran was lying in bed, his head in a mess. Too much had happened recently.

His anger soon dissipated. He had wanted to go open the door for Feng Hua and explain that he and Xiao Zhijie were friends and couldn’t possibly do those disgusting things. But then he didn’t understand why he needed to explain. He was just too tired and thought that there were many rooms in this house anyway, not just one bedroom, so he should let Feng Hua reflect on it, then he fell asleep.

Tick-tock, tick-tock. Time ticked by in the stillness of the night.

Something seemed to be slowly and silently climbing and changing, unnoticed.

Around 3am.

The door of the bedroom was knocked, softly.

“Knock knock… knock knock…”

Of course, it didn’t wake Feng Yeran up.

“Knock knock… knock knock…”

And so, knocking for almost ten minutes, the sound was almost merged with the sound of the clock and the breathing in the night.

Then, the knocking became a little more urgent.

“Knock knock knock knock… knock knock knock knock…”

Feng Yeran stirred in a daze.

Someone was speaking deliriously outside the door, but he couldn’t hear clearly. “Ye’er… sorry… open the door… I… him… I want… together… please… open the door… I’m so… sad… why… not… open the door…”

The knocking then became a little softer, but he could faintly hear sobbing outside the door. First, it was the weeping of an adult man, low and suppressed, and then, it sounded like the crying of a child, uncontrollable.

Feng Yeran finally gained some consciousness. He heard the increasingly urgent knocking mixed with vague crying sounds.

“Feng Hua?” he asked.

The knocking turned into a pounding, getting louder and louder, with the piercing sound of nails scraping the wooden door, almost as if an animal was constantly scratching at the door with its claws. It was creepy.

“Feng Hua? Is that you?” Feng Yeran went to the door.

No one answered him.

What answered him was the increasingly urgent pounding, the sound of turning the door lock hard, and banging.

Again and again, thumping and thumping.

The walls weren’t thick to begin with, and such collisions almost made the entire room shake with it.

Feng Yeran watched the door being hit again and again. Suddenly, he began to get scared.

In particular, when the banging became not like that of a human at all—but rather terrifyingly strong, a frenzied banging, almost about to break through the door the next moment, continuous, with increasing urgency—he was completely stupefied.

In the darkness, his mind went blank, his pupils dilated, and his mouth went dry.

The only thing he knew was that he didn’t believe it was Feng Hua outside the door.

He was very, very scared. He had to hide!

He hid in the wardrobe like a child.

He covered his ears in the wardrobe, trying to escape this sudden fear.

But the banging didn’t stop at all.


Everything was shaking and disintegrating.

The door lock came loose.

The door cracked open and fragments struck on metal and pounded on the ground with violent thuds.

Feng Yeran almost screamed out. He covered his lips.

He heard the creak of the door being opened.

Then, the sound of lights turning on.


Step by step.

He didn’t know why he was so scared, but his whole body was shaking. He curled up and hid in his clothes.

He heard footsteps coming from the door to the bed.


It sounded like Feng Hua’s voice, yet not like Feng Hua’s voice. Because the voice was frantic, frightening—it was clearly a gentle voice, but it sent shivers down his spine. It was totally different from the feeling Feng Hua usually gave!

“Where are you, Ye’er?”

The blanket was thrown to the floor, the cupboard was opened, and the cup fell to the floor and shattered—the usual Feng Hua would never have done that. Feng Yeran recalled that this was the voice of the man in his dream.

“It’s so late. Don’t play hide-and-seek with me! If you don’t obediently come out, I’ll punish you.”

The sound of footsteps approached the wardrobe. Feng Yeran suppressed his breaths, and his heart was about to beat out of his chest. He covered his lips and heard the sound of something breaking again. It was probably the photo frame above the head of the bed. The man didn’t seem to value anything. All his actions were towards the same goal—destruction. A demonically terrifying creature.

However, the man didn’t open the wardrobe.

The sound of footsteps went far away.

Then, there was no other sound. The man had left.

At least ten minutes later, Feng Yeran quietly poked his head out of his clothes. He breathed in the fresh air and opened the wardrobe slightly, revealing a crack through which light leaked in. He leaned to the crack and looked out—


Unable to restrain himself any longer, he screamed out, almost fainting with fright!

The red eyes were staring at him from just outside the crack.

The wardrobe was jerked open and the demon looked down at Feng Yeran with an eerie grin on his face:

“Ah—I, found, you!”

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