Chapter 6 – Weird Roommate

I Treat You as a Brother
Xena (ch. 1-4), tamago (ch. 5+)
68 Chapters

Chapter 1 - He claims to be the gays’ heavenly dish Chapter 2 - Facing men head on Chapter 3 - xxr Chapter 4 - Online friends meeting Chapter 5 - An Intimate First Encounter with the Iron Straight Man Chapter 6 - Weird Roommate Chapter 7 - Mouth-Watering Tofu Chapter 8 - Super! ☆Fantasy School Love❤Story☆ Chapter 9 - Big Awesome… What? Chapter 10 - A Night of Passion Chapter 11 - Your Wife Likes to Cry Chapter 12 - Another Night of Passion Chapter 13 - Danger Lurking Everywhere Chapter 14 - Do You Have a Girlfriend? Chapter 15 - He’s Gay Not Feminine Chapter 16 - Going Home in the Middle of Business Chapter 17 - It's Hard to Think of a Chapter Name Chapter 18 - A Dangerous Situation Chapter 19 - Fang · Small White Flower · Mo Chapter 20 - Are You Lusting After My Charm? Chapter 21 - It's All Strategy Chapter 22 - Do You Want to Fight at the Summit of Niohuru? Chapter 23 - Gay Love at Every Corner?! Chapter 24 - An Assist From a Rival Chapter 25 - I Know Fang Mo, He’s Not That Kind of Person Chapter 26 - Suspecting Others of Stealing the Axe Chapter 27 - It's Settled Chapter 28 - That Man Still Doesn’t Have a Last Name Chapter 29 - It Appeared, The Straight Man’s Favorite Basketball Chapter 30 - A Storm of Jealousy Chapter 31 - Happiness Appearing Without Warning Chapter 32 - Ordinary Friendship for an Ordinary Straight Guy Chapter 33 - He Looked Good, Is That Not Okay? Chapter 34 - Aren’t You My Wife? Chapter 35 - Thirty-Five is Too Late Chapter 36 - It’s Not Too Late to Admit Your Mistakes After You’ve Pursued Chapter 37 - I Don’t Understand You Straight Men Chapter 38 - Completely Flat Chapter 39 - Another Kind of Chest-to-Back Chapter 40 - Master of Reasoning Chapter 41 - BigAwesome1’s Worries Chapter 42 - Fang Mo Joins the Reasoning Team Chapter 43 - Xu Xiran Can’t Be Outdone Chapter 44 - Making Use of Every Second to Date Chapter 45 - You Are Jealous Chapter 46 - A Great Detective’s Reputation Has Been Ruined Chapter 47 - Xuedi is About to Have the Night of His Dreams Chapter 48 - A Guy Friend’s Coat and a Wife Body Pillow Chapter 49 - Xu Xiran Takes it Off Chapter 50 - So Sour! Chapter 51 - Confidential Conversations With Gay Friends Chapter 52 - Do You Like Fang Mo? Chapter 53 - Can’t Bear to Cross-Dress, Can’t Win an Otaku’s Heart Chapter 54 - The Straight Man and His Last Stubbornness Chapter 55 - Do You Hear The Beating of His Heart Chapter 56 - Xiaoyao Who? Chapter 57 - Spring Dream Chapter 58 - Shock! He Had Such Thoughts About His Brother?! Chapter 59 - Amazing! His Brother Was Also Harboring Ulterior Motives?! Chapter 60 - Passionate! The Otaku’s Enthusiastic Offensive Play! Chapter 61 - A Few Tricks in Love (For Real) Chapter 62 - Love Letter Chapter 63 - Approximating as Being Kissed Chapter 64 - Couple Filter Chapter 65 - Is the Danmei Manga You Mentioned Good? Chapter 66 - Do You Want a Massage Chapter 67 - What is This Reaction Chapter 68 - Fantastic Anime Appreciation

6 – Weird Roommate

Translator: tamago
Editor: musk

Surnamed Liu, small and skinny, and has made a subtle move towards him…

Facing the seemingly sincere smile of the other person, Fang Mo silently took half a step back and asked, “There should be two more people, right? Are they not here?”

“They’re not here yet,” Liu Xiaochang said as he took another step forward and reached out to take his luggage. “All three of you are new this semester except for me. You can choose a bed you like while there’s still no one here. Do you want to sleep in my bottom bunk?”

Fang Mo grabbed his luggage and without hesitation, walked to the side opposite from him, “I like to sleep in late. Your side is next to the window and will be in the sun in the morning.”

If it wasn’t for Xu Xiran giving him a warning earlier, he might’ve not been able to pick up on Liu Xiaochang being odd. Maybe the scratch on his hand was just an accident, and he was just naturally surprised by his appearance and enthusiastic because of his easy-going personality.

But this person has touched Xu Xiran’s butt!

However, unlike Xu Xiran, he was not embarrassed by same-sex advances or ambiguous behavior. If a pursuer didn’t annoy him, he’d reject them bluntly but politely, and if he disliked them, he’d roll his eyes to the ceiling. Naturally, Liu Xiaochang wasn’t his type, but knowing that he had harassed the male god of his dreams, Fang Mo didn’t want to give him the slightest bit of a good face.

Liu Xiaochang had no interest in further discussion, so he did not continue being courteous. As if nothing had happened, he walked back to his desk and sat down, watching Fang Mo unpack his things.

A few minutes later, he spoke again, “Wow, you brought this many skincare products?”

Fang Mo looked up at him, and then continued to organize his things, “Is this a lot?”

It was just a facial cleanser plus a water cream, and a facial cream that can be divided into a day cream and a night cream. Just basic care. He also had three different facial masks and a hand cream in a package on its way.

He put his facial cleanser in the bathroom and put the rest in a drawer. He wasn’t afraid of people casually using his products; he was more afraid that it’d be annoying if it all piled up by the sink and took up too much public space.

“So exquisite,” said Liu Xiaochang.

Fang Mo didn’t answer and went to organize his underwear. Liu Xiaochang, who was sitting on the side, stopped talking and quietly looked him up and down.

“Is something wrong?” said Fang Mo.

“No.” He didn’t know if Liu Xiaochang was actually dumb or pretending to be dumb. “What’s the matter, do you want me to help?”

“The way you’re looking at me is making me feel a little uncomfortable,” Fang Mo said very bluntly.

He looked directly at Liu Xiaochang’s face as he spoke, and after a while, he suddenly had some other thoughts. At a first glance, he thought that this person looked rather ordinary, but upon closer inspection, he was actually quite handsome. With his slender appearance, he had a bit of a feminine look; like a pure and delicate girl.

This type of 01Shou or bottom is actually not very popular in the circle2Referring to the gay community. Most pure 1s3Gong or top prefer the more masculine type, and in the eyes of some ordinary people, strong men who are not good-looking are unexpectedly popular. From Fang Mo’s experience, Xu Xiran’s type is the most sought-after.

Of course, he was not bad himself. After all, his looks were up there.

A type like Liu Xiaochang is more appealing to bisexuals, or straight men who are not firm in their stance and may be swayed. But as for gay men, this type is certainly not popular.

Obviously, he was not Fang Mo’s tea. Ignoring all other external factors, the two body types were simply incompatible. Fang Mo was 179 cm tall and had the audacity to pretend he was a 0.54Switch. He had been sought after by countless smaller 0s, but deep down, he only wants to be the one laying flat.

Normally among gays, when two 0.5 collide, they each have to count on the other person to tearfully make the sacrifice for love to be the 1.

However, it was inconvenient for him to tell Liu Xiaochang all this now, so he could only deal with these thoughts on his own with a straight face.

Ten minutes ago, when he was on his way back to his dormitory alone, he had made a decision. He would work hard to pretend that he was a straight man, so as to not be seen through by Xu Xiran.

He was going to boil the frog in warm water5 The meaning behind this saying is that if you boil a frog in water and turn up the heat too quickly (i.e. change environments too fast), it will realize and try to jump out. However, if you start with warm water and gradually add heat, it won’t realize the change until it’s too late. In this context, Fang Mo wants to slowly but surely try to convert his Xu Xiran 😉.

At the same time, he was going to have to work hard to drive away all the other flies around him, including Liu Xiaochang.

What he had said just now was ruthless, but Liu Xiaochang didn’t take it to heart and smiled at him, “You’re handsome, I couldn’t help but take a second glance.”

Fang Mo decided that he was going to compete to see who had the thicker skin. He turned around, and as he continued to organize, he said, “Alright, look all you want. It’ll be five yuan a minute, you can time it yourself.”

“Really,” Liu Xiaochang smiled. “Then, handsome, do you have other options? The more expensive kind? I’m kind of interested.”

Fang Mo was defeated.

There was no one in the world more shameless than him.

Just as his head began to hurt, his phone vibrated in his pocket. When he took it out, he saw that it was a message from Zou Shun.

[“Are you free right now!!!!!”]

The row of exclamation points fully displayed his excitement.

Fang Mo smiled at the screen.

Although it wasn’t Xu Xiran, the subtle excitement in his heart had long since died down. He actually really wanted to hear more of Zou Shun’s WTFs.

Being alone in the room with Liu Xiaochang made him uncomfortable, so he went to the bathroom, closed the door, and called Zou Shun.

As soon as the call connected, he heard a passionate bellow from the other side.

“Tell me the truth!”

Fang Mo grinned from ear to ear and played dumb, “What truth? What do you want to hear?”

“That handsome guy just now! When did you guys meet? What’s his relationship with you? An online friend, what site? Give me the website, I want to visit it!”

Fang Mo hesitated for a moment. After all, he couldn’t bear to let Zou Shun kneel down and admit that he had been wrong and call him Daddy. He was also embarrassed to reveal that he had defected in the midst of battle for the sake of beauty.

“It has nothing to do with the website, I met him by chance,” Fang Mo said. “We chatted for a bit, then ended up talking some more. He’s not from our circle and doesn’t know that I am. If you see him in the future, don’t say anything dumb, okay?”

“He’s straight?” Zou Shun asked.

“Mn, iron straight,” Fang Mo replied. “Don’t think of any ideas.”

“…It’s not whether I’m thinking of ideas or not,” Zou Shun’s tone sounded a little tangled. “Although it’s not my place to say this… a straight man really is a road of no return, you know that?”

Fang Mo was silent. These days, Zou Shun had been through so many emotional ups and downs for the man that he liked, so he knew that Zou Shun was genuinely worried for him.

“But the temptation is indeed a little bigger…” Zou Shun spoke again.

Fang Mo coughed.

“Damn, he’s really handsome,” Zou Shun sighed. “If I were single, I wouldn’t be able to hold back.”

Fang Mo thought to himself, Aren’t you single now? It sounds like you’re not. Afraid of hurting him, but more afraid of increasing his enthusiasm, he held back.

“Don’t mess with me,” he said in a serious tone.

Zou Shun laughed when he heard those words: “It’s rare seeing you this attracted.”

Fang Mo was indeed really picky.

The root cause of it was his narcissism. Of all the people he has met, he has never found anyone worthy enough for him. He was either not handsome enough, or not tall enough, or his shoulders were not wide enough, or his voice was not pleasant enough, or he lacked charisma when he talked, or his teeth were not neat when he smiled, or his hair roots were greasy, or his fingernails were too ugly, or his legs were too hairy and it looked disgusting, or his legs had no hair which didn’t look manly enough.

Nitpicky, yet self-pitying6 There are two idioms here: the first one is to blow apart the hairs upon fur to find a defect, and the second one is to look at one’s shadow and feel sorry for oneself.

Zou Shun used to tease him, saying that he didn’t like the same sex at all and only looked up to himself.

Now it could be finally proven that he just hadn’t met the right person yet that could truly move his heart.

Fang Mo didn’t know why, but when he thought about this, his face turned slightly red.

“Good luck,” Zou Shun continued, “if there’s anything that I can do for you, don’t hesitate to ask, I…”

Right as he said those words, there was a faint sound outside the door that sounded like a knock, followed by a deep and rich male voice.

“Excuse me, does Fang Mo live here?”

Fang Mo, who was sitting on the toilet seat, immediately jumped up.

“Let’s put that aside,” he lowered his voice and quickly said to the phone. “Something came up, I’ll talk to you later!”

Before Zou Shun could respond, he once again cut off the call because of Xu Xiran.

When he rushed out of the bathroom, he saw Liu Xiaochang standing by the inside of the door, smiling and greeting outside the room.

“Hi, long time no see. Do you remember me?”

Outside the door, Xu Xiran tensed and got ready for battle.

“You were looking for me?” Fang Mo shouted over Liu Xiaochang.

Xu Xiran’s eyes moved back and forth between the two of them, and cautiously asked, “You two live together?!”

  • 1
    Shou or bottom
  • 2
    Referring to the gay community
  • 3
    Gong or top
  • 4
  • 5
    The meaning behind this saying is that if you boil a frog in water and turn up the heat too quickly (i.e. change environments too fast), it will realize and try to jump out. However, if you start with warm water and gradually add heat, it won’t realize the change until it’s too late. In this context, Fang Mo wants to slowly but surely try to convert his Xu Xiran 😉
  • 6
    There are two idioms here: the first one is to blow apart the hairs upon fur to find a defect, and the second one is to look at one’s shadow and feel sorry for oneself


helo i'm tamago~ hope u enjoy my translations (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵)

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