Chapter 30.2 – If you don’t want, then I do

30th –If you don’t want, then I do

Editor: Sammy
Proofreader: Bubbles


Chu Yu didn’t look up.

Not until a familiar voice called his name, “Chu Yu.”

Holding the transparent plastic barrel of the black felt-tip pen, Chu Yu raised his eyes and looked over.

His mother, Shi Yaling, wearing a silk shirt with a white bow tie and a tailored black suit coat1the young woman wearing a beige dress last chapter was the assistant/secretary, was standing in the office doorway, staring at him.


Chu Yu uttered, feeling as if his voice wasn’t his own and not in his control.

He realized that he hadn’t seen Shi Yaling in two or three months.

For some time, there was unexpectedly a sense of unfamiliarity.

Shi Yaling looked at the principal. “Tell me about the specific situation.”

The principal promptly explained the whole story in detail.

He originally thought that Chu Yu’s cheating issue was a matter of reputation. To be cautious, he reported it to Shi Yaling’s secretary.

Unexpectedly, Shi Yaling came here in person.

“I understand.”

After listening, Shi Yaling gazed towards Guan Yiyang and Fang Mingzhe who were sitting on the sofa. “What gave you the confidence to spare no efforts to slander Chu Yu for cheating?”

She didn’t appear gentle, on the contrary, because she’d been in a high position for a long time, she had a domineering and tyrannical aura.

Guan Yiyang’s face turned pale and Fang Mingzhe’s breathing became even more flustered.

They didn’t anticipate that the principal would be so scared of getting into trouble that he’d invite Chu Yu’s mother to the school!

Chu Yu watched this scene without any interest.

In front of outsiders, his mother vowed to protect him, because it concerned herself and the Chu family’s dignity.

Lowering his head, Chu Yu finished solving the remaining questions then raised his hand to indicate. “Sir, I’m done.”

The principal quickly took his math test paper, compared them with the answer key, and began marking.

Soon, he announced the results. “Student Chu Yu scored 109 points on the math exam.”


Fang Mingzhe suddenly exclaimed.

Seeing that all eyes were on himself, he swallowed his saliva heavily and explained with a hoarse voice, “Chu Yu… It’s impossible for him to get so many points on the test! How could he get this many points? He must’ve cheated! As far as his level is concerned, it’s impossible!”

“Student Fang Mingzhe,” the principal glanced at Shi Yaling and with a cold expression, chided Fang Mingzhe, “facts have proven that Student Chu Yu finished the test paper on the spot and scored 109 points!”

Fang Mingzhe was still going to dispute when Lu Shi, who hadn’t had any sense of presence, suddenly said, “I just remembered that I happened to overhear some secret conversation in the sports equipment room a few days ago.”

As soon as Lu Shi’s voice fell, a recording sounded in the office.

“Do you have the questions?”

It was Guan Yiyang’s voice.

Another male voice answered, “I have it, I have it. Damn, that scared me to death. Fortunately, my dad’s ten-twenty year old habits haven’t changed. The key to the drawer was thrown in the flower vase so I found it. Yiyang, you should finish this set of test papers first and memorize the answers. Your grades are unstable, and this time, it’s critical that you don’t screw up! Get a high score and ruthlessly trample on that surnamed Chu, see if that gang of second-generation ancestors will still be arrogant!”

“Okay, I know, there’ll difintely be no problems.”

In the recording, Guan Yiyang even laughed. “You guys are making such a big fuss over something minor. With Chu Yu’s level, how high do you think he can get on the test?”

Fang Mingzhe’s voice wasn’t timid at all like a moment ago as he laughed. “You can’t ever be so sure. They say that Lu-Shen’s tutoring Chu Yu. Lu-shen’s ability to guess key points is reckoned to be in defiance of the natural order, so to be on the safe side, hurry up and use these papers!”

The recording ended there.

“In this recording, one is Guan Yiyang, one is Fang Mingzhe, and the other is Shen Zhongming, the son of the teaching and research department’s head. I ran into them by chance. They were sneaking around, so I followed them and recorded their conversation.”

Lu Shi’s expression was dark and his eyes were extremely cold. He sat on the sofa, staring at Guan Yiyang. “I’m suddenly curious. Besides you, Shen Zhongming, and Fang Mingzhe, are there a few more of you who want to splash dirty water onto Chu Yu and step on him?”

The principal was covered in a cold sweat.

He began to bemoan his own cleverness.

Chu Yu was suspected of cheating and the first thing he thought to do was call Shi Yaling’s assistant and take preventative measures. After that, no matter what the result was, the blame wouldn’t be on him.

Now, Shi Yaling was here and she’d heard with her own ears that her son was framed by his fellow classmates.

“President Shi—”

“You… Mr. Zhang,” Shi Yaling ordered, “I think the matter is already clear. As for how to deal with it, there are school rules for your reference.”

She turned to Chu Yu who was filling in the physics test paper. “Come out with me.”

Chu Yu put down the pen and followed Shi Yaling out of the office and into the small meeting room next door.

A slight click sounded and the door was closed.

Chu Yu’s voice was dry and his tone deliberately relaxed. “Mom, why did you come here?”

“I had a meeting at eleven o’clock, it happened to be nearby so I just passed by your school.”

“Mm, remember to eat lunch even if you’re busy at work, or your stomach will feel uncomfortable.”

After saying this, Chu Yu’s throat hurt.

The principal suspected him and Guan Yiyang and Fang Mingzhe framed him, but he didn’t care.

After all, if he’d taken every similar occurrence to heart, he’d have already died of anger long ago.

Besides, no cheating meant no cheating. He earned every point by taking the test himself, he had confidence.

But without other people’s eyes and facing Shi Yaling alone, Chu Yu laid the calmness he held up aside, suddenly feeling wronged.

“Mama, I didn’t cheat. In this monthly exam, I earned 199th place and I also took second place in English in the entire grade. The homeroom teacher said—”

“Chu Yu.”

Shi Yaling interrupted Chu Yu. Seeing his flushed eyes and a bit aggrieved appearance, her eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t care about your grades, good or bad. I also don’t care whether you cheat in exams, or whether there’s a problem with your interpersonal relationships. This is all your own business. I don’t want you to be a weak person, unable to solve even these small issues. I’m very busy and don’t have enough time to help you solve your troubles and oversee this kind of immature, vindictive farce between minors, understand?”

Chu Yu was stunned.

At this moment, his breathing became tight and even the place where his heart rested ached.

His fingers trembled by his sides. “Mama, I—”

He wanted to tell her, I didn’t understand before, but now I do. My monthly test scores have improved a lot. I can study hard and I’m very good. I’m actually very smart. I can concentrate on studying and haven’t read a single comic page for the greater half of the month.

So, can you not give up on me so easily…

And look at me.

Shi Yaling got up, the white bow tie of her silk shirt drawing an arc. “I’m leaving first.”

Chu Yu lowered his head and said nothing.

The sound of high heels treading on the floor reverberated in the conference room.

He tilted his head, looked at Shi Yaling’s back, and called in a hoarse voice, “Mama—”

Shi Yaling turned her head with a frown. “What else?”

Subconsciously clenching his fingers, Chu Yu shook his head and said gruffly, “It’s nothing.”

The door of the meeting room was closed again.

It was completely silent, void of any noise.

Leather seats surrounded the oval conference table and the lights weren’t even turned on.

Standing in place, Chu Yu suddenly bent the corner of his mouth while watching the dust floating up and down within the ray of light.

He suddenly felt like a joke.

Shi Yaling didn’t care at all, whether he really cheated or was wronged and framed.

She also didn’t care how many points he scored, whether he made progress or regressed.

Her only requirement was that he was healthy, happy, and safe; to not encounter any danger, cause any trouble, or waste any of her time and energy.

She’d already given up on him since long ago.

Chu Yu felt a bit cold.

A chill ran up along his spine and through countless nerves, spreading to his whole body.

He slowly squatted on the ground and hugged himself, vaguely feeling stiff in his fingers while his breathing became uncomfortable.

Without sunlight, the overwhelmingly gloomy coldness flooded him.

The door of the meeting room was pushed open once more and closed thereafter.

Very light footsteps sounded.

Chu Yu sluggishly turned his head and saw a person walking towards him against the light.

It was Lu Shi.

Standing in front of Chu Yu, Lu Shi saw that his red eyes filled with confusion as he looked up at him. Lu Shi squatted, similar to that time on the low school wall where he’d pulled Chu Yu up with his outstretched hand.

Chu Yu’s line of sight focused.

He gazed at the hand that reached out to him.

Cold white skin, blue-green blood vessels, and fingertips that he’d bitten an unknown number of times.

After ten seconds, Chu Yu carefully placed his hand on it.

Grasping tightly, Lu Shi pulled the person up. His voice held its usual indifference. “Want comfort?”

Chu Yu stared at him blankly, not answering.

Lu Shi didn’t ask anymore. He raised his arm and took the person into his embrace.

“I had asked you to promise me that no matter what the results were, you weren’t allowed to cry, but, if you want to, you can secretly cry. I’ll pretend not to know.”

Chu Yu responded in a low and heavy nasal voice.

“Lu Shi.”

“Mm, I’m here.”

Chu Yu raised his hands, wrapped it around Lu Shi’s waist, and tightened.

His fingers tightly clutched Lu Shi’s clothes, wrinkling the fabric.

“Lu Shi.”

“I’m here.”

Lu Shi lowered his head, rubbed his lips against Chu Yu’s ears, and gently said, “Cry for her one last time, okay?”

After a long time, Chu Yu’s answer came. His voice was very soft, and even his final syllable quavered.


Lu Shi curled his lips and soothingly stroked Chu Yu’s hair. “Very good.”

The meeting room was empty.

Lu Shi hugged the person and looked at the closed door, remembering the conversation he’d heard while waiting at the door just now, as well as Shi Yaling who had passed by him.

You personally pushed him to my side.

If you don’t want, then I do.








The author has something to say: Here’s a teardrop also in the shape of a heart as my love for you. Wuwuwu, writing, crying; I’ll leisurely cry first as respect qaq

staff shenanigans

Xena’s translating adventuresThe last line was really hard to tl without sounding awkward and losing its feelings. Raw: 你不要,我要。Literally translates to: You don’t want, I want. At first I thought of, ‘If you don’t want him, then I want him’, adding the ‘him’ basically, but that’s too intrusive(?) so I consulted Sammy and came up with just “If you don’t want, then I do.” Now, if you’re interested, channel your inner Lu Shi, imagine wanting bb Chu Yu, and suggest your own translation hshshhs




  • 1
    the young woman wearing a beige dress last chapter was the assistant/secretary


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11 thoughts on “Chapter 30.2 – If you don’t want, then I do”

  1. 😭😭😭 I feel so bad for Chu Yu! Hate is not the opposite of love, indifference is. Chu Yu deserves so much better!

    Thanks for your hard work translating!

  2. I’m not crying you are TTATT After taking a few minutes to let my tears clear, where is Chu Yu’s dad in all this? Is he dead? Gone? Thank goodness Lu Shi is there for a shoulder to cry on I’m gonna go cry some more now, thanks for the chapter, though it hurt QAQ

    • It was mentioned in earlier chapters that Chu Yu’s dad died in an accident when he was a child so their mother had to manage the family business

  3. ow
    thanks for the chapter ♡
    thanks, lu shi ♡

    i guess mom wanting some face in front of outsiders makes more sense. she’s got a high status and all.

    as for the awkward title of this chapter, i thought along the lines of “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure” but that was calling chu yu trash so i decided against it. then i thought of when i’m being picky with my food and my family is like “more for us!” but lu shi is the one that’s food. then just now i got “are you gonna eat that?” which is still weird. so maybe “if you don’t want him, give him to me” or “i’ll take that, if you don’t mind” or something. still strange since i’m referring to a person but avoiding pronouns and names.

  4. Me: * reads*  “What gave you the confidence to spare no efforts to slander Chu Yu for cheating?” – Yes!!!!🤗🥰😍 Mama your awesome!

    Me a little later: (ुŏ̥̥̥̥⌓ŏ̥̥̥̥) ु ⁽ƈ ͡ (ुŏ̥̥̥̥םŏ̥̥̥̥) ु
    – I take it all back!

    Thanks for the chapter. ;^;

  5. I am so damn sad for Chu Yu! How come she is like that? What part of being indifferent to him would she classify as “as long as he’s safe and happy?”

    thanks for the chapter! <3

    • I think what that really means is, “Be quiet and don’t cause me any scandals in either causing trouble or making me be accused of being a bad mother”. She doesn’t care about him but does care about her reputation so as far as she’s concerned he has nothing to complain about as long as he has money thrown at him and therefore no ability to cause trouble for her. The sad part is that she’s right- no one will care how sad and unloved a child is as long as they are kept well fed, clean and without physical damage to them. Emotional neglect doesn’t register as a “real” form of abuse to a lot of people…

  6. I feel as though lu is somewhat addicted to the thought of having chu(who was like a sheltered child) by his side, only leaning on him, only seeing him, only needing him and no one else. Especially not his mother anymore, it’s a sort of vindictive win for lu in a sense. Considering how his parents (especially his mother) never gave him control over his things and his life, the thought of having unshakable control over a person who resembles a child, it fuels him. He is addicted to the power it gives him, the shiver inducing authority he holds at his hands is like water to a thirsty man who had been stuck in a desert for all his life.

    So in a way, when the mother pushed chu to lose his dependency on her, lu thought of it as a win over the ‘Parent’, over the ‘Mother’.

    In a sense it’s like he’s saying, “I won.”

    Of course these are all just theories
    ( ;∀;)


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